“Oh, what a tangled web we weave. When first we practice to deceive!” – Sir Walter Scott
Have you ever lied and then watched anxiously as the lie begins to weave a web of deceit? I have. More than once. I know from experience how important it is to be completely honest in order to create a fulfilling and peaceful life. No matter how hard it is to tell the truth, being honest with ourselves and others is a sign of self-love, personal power and respect. Sure, it can be quite challenging to always tell the truth but honesty is the foundation of all successful relationships, including the one we have with ourselves, and with God. Honesty is vital to establishing trust, so having the courage to be completely honest regardless of consequences is a choice we make in order to trust ourselves to do the right thing. But, temptation to avoid embarrassment or punishment or to defend our fragile ego is often hard to resist. And, rather than remain honest we choose to lie.
By lying, no matter what justification we create to defend our dishonesty, we have knowingly betrayed ourselves. Each time we choose to lie we feel the negative impact. We instantly become caught in a sticky web that grows as one lie weaves two more. Two weave four. Four weave sixteen and on and on until we are completely stuck in our trap of dishonesty. Once we lie we can only free ourselves by choosing to become honest because in a web of lies, Spider is truth. Truth always comes out, just like a Spider always knows something has been caught in her web. We can only free ourselves by being honest about our dishonesty.
Another aspect of being completely truthful is waking up to a refusal to do nothing when we know we are being lied to. We know a lie in our soul. We FEEL dishonesty, manipulation, and betrayal. When we choose to ignore our feelings in favor of listening to our mind’s justifications, we have been dishonest with ourselves. We have betrayed ourselves and what we know to be right. The entangling mistake of going against our feelings is that our head DOES NOT FEEL!
Our unfeeling head will rationalize any and all behavior. Head will not force us to seek fact and truth. Head is satisfied with opinion, assumption and speculation. Head is not the part of us that admits when we are wrong or acknowledges we have been deceived. Head has no ethics or morals. Consequently, our head will justify defending a liar, preferring to battle our own soul that clearly knows ignoring dishonesty has been the wrong choice all along.
You and I do not create an honest life with our head. It is our heart, our soul, the part of us connected to God that is our trustworthy spiritual guide. God knows a lie and the soul of who we are that is connected to God also knows when something we are being told does not add up to truth. For example, we know in our gut our partner is having an affair while our head is attempting to convince us we’re making everything up. Our head wants to believe the lie even when our soul knows otherwise.
We sabotage the relationship we have with ourselves and others by defending or supporting anyone who lies. To accept dishonesty, while knowing we are being lied to, also causes us to be caught up in the web of deceit. And, remember, in a web of lies Spider is truth, which always comes out to gobble up ALL who are caught in her web.
You and I learn hard lessons through the mistakes we make. Lying is the mistake of not valuing truth. Honesty allows us to appreciate that having nothing to hide and no one to hide it from, and refusing to allow ourselves to be lied to, are the two values of honesty that free us from ever again becoming ensnared in a web of deceit.
By the way a loving God does not keep score of our mistakes. God only cares that we choose to wake up. That we choose to be a completely honest person. That we refuse to support anyone who weaves a web of lies, blame, chaos and irresponsibility.
